The below is an open letter from the bee population to one Winnie T. Pooh.
Dearest Pooh Bear,
It has come to our attention that—despite our best efforts—you continue scale many a tree all over the Hundred Acre Wood in the search for hunny.
In one recent incident, upon clambering up the north side of a great oak tree beside the sandy pit where Roo plays, you deliberately, intentionally, and purposefully introduced your unwashed paw to the bountiful harvest of fresh hunny that our colony has so slaved over for the past several weeks.
Now, Pooh Bear, need we remind you of the dangers associated with your animal-like behavior? While hygiene is certainly one of our primary concerns, as your fellow neighbors, we greatly care for your safety. As you so elegantly put it, when you climbed up the side of a tree in a hunny-induced stupor:
“Oh I wouldn’t climb this tree
If a Pooh flew like a bee
But I wouldn’t be a bear then
So I guess I wouldn’t care then.”
Well, Mr. Pooh Bear, sir, you should indeed care. Bears do not have wings. Additionally, due to the rather large nature of your tummy, you risk quite the harrowing fall with one wrong step.
We bees pride ourselves in the sweet-n-sticky wonderful quality of our delicious hunny. While we are pleased to hear of your desire for a small smackerel, we kindly ask that you please refrain from disturbing any of our hives in the future. Might we suggest that, as an alternative, you visit the murmuring creek and devise a clever way to catch a fish. Perhaps even a short walk through the sunny part of the forest would take your mind off of our delicious treasure trove of hunny. A bear of stuff ‘n’ fluff, such as yourself, mustn’t stoop to the level of a thief.
Most Sincerely,
Bees
