12 Ways to Rafiki-fy Yourself

We would gladly be monkeys if it meant Rafiki could be our uncle; lamentably, science has not yet come that far. So instead, all we can do is channel our inner mandrill-shamans as best we can in the time that we’re given. In that spirit, read on for some foolproof tips to Rafiki-fy your life:


Others: Use the stairs.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Arbitrarily scaling walls instead.
Rafiki climbs up Pride Rock


Others: Smile and wave at babies.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Wiping fruit on babies’ faces.
Rafiki christens Simba in The Lion King


Others: Cradle a baby in their arms.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Holding a baby like a boombox.
Rafiki carries Simba on his shoulder in The Lion King


Others: Remain relatively stoic when they realize something.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Laughing hysterically at every new realization.
Rafiki laughing in The Lion King


Others: Rush out and tell people when they find out the long-lost lion prince lives.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Telling no one and instead declaring “it is time” with a wild look in your eyes.
Rafiki says it is time in The Lion King


Others: Spend nights sleeping.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Spending nights dancing in a tree and chanting, “Asante sana, squash banana.”
Rafiki dancing in tree in The Lion King


Others: Announce their presence in the company of others.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Spying on others from afar.
Rafiki swinging in tree and watching Simba in The Lion King


Others: Introduce themselves when asked, “Who are you?”
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Refusing to answer any questions except by repeating the question back.
Rafiki asking who are you in The Lion King


Others: Actually tell a secret after whispering, “Come here, it’s a secret.”
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Not telling a secret, and instead reverting to your old cryptic standby of “Asante sana, squash banana.”
Rafiki chanting asante sana in Simba's ear in The Lion King


Others: Do not incorporate yoga positions into casual conversations.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Doing yoga literally always.
Rafiki saying I know your father in The Lion King


Others: Offer straightforward advice.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Stylishly shrouding your advice in metaphors.
Rafiki hits Simba in the head in The Lion King


Others: Hug their friends after a big victory.
Rafiki-fy yourself by: Also hugging your friends after a big victory, except by now it’s extra special because you’ve Rafiki-fied yourself so successfully that everyone regards you as their wise monkey uncle whose love means the world to them.
Simba and Rafiki hugging in The Lion King


What’s your favorite thing about Rafiki? Tell us below!

Posted 4 years Ago
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