Gordo has always been a fan favorite. We loved watching him, Lizzie, and Miranda navigate the choppy waters of adolescence during the show’s heyday but at the time, we did not fully appreciate Gordo for the genius he was. Re-watching the show as our older, more seasoned selves, it’s clear: Gordo might be the wisest teen ever. Honestly.
On appearances: “You’ll never figure out who you are if you’re trying to be somebody else.”
On social status: “Who you are is way more important than who you sit with at lunch.”
On politics: “If she wants to be the voice of the people, she’s gotta hang with everybody. Not just the drama club.”
On being a teenager: “Parents scrape and sacrifice to provide us with shelter, support and guidance, and in return, we have as little to do with them as possible. It’s nature’s law.”
On dating: “Everyone’s paired off. It’s like Noah’s Arc, but with fluorescent lighting.”
On acceptance: “Yeah, well, there’s lots of weird stuff in this world—tofu bacon, hairless cats, country music.”
On sharing information with parents: “As little communication as possible. It prepares us for marriage.”
On growing up: “Being humiliated during puberty can have deep and lasting psychological consequences.”
On money: “Free? Free is my favorite number.”
Who says things like this? Answer: Only your wise grandfather and David “Gordo” Gordon.